


Don't Call Me Lancelot!

by yuurikaa



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, M/M, Multi, Mutual Pining, Nonbinary Pidge | Katie Holt, POV Alternating, Pining, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-22 22:46:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8304106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuurikaa/pseuds/yuurikaa
Summary: The Kingdom of Altea was taken over by the Kingdom of Galra. The surviving heir to the throne, Keith, is escorted out of Altea by an inexperienced knight named Lance under orders of the King. The two then must round together an army in the Kingdom of Balmera along with the help of a blacksmith and a magical being. The Prince starts off not trusting his knight because of their awkward meeting, but the knight proves himself time and time again and Prince Keith slowly starts realizing how much he appreciates his Knight after all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So this is like my first published fanfiction since like--2012. It's been so long, but it feels so great to be back at it!  
> I'll be rusty at first, but I should be good to go for the next chapter!  
> I--don't know if I'll have a posting schedule just yet. I'm an adult with a super busy life lmao  
> cliche i know.  
> But hey! Check me out on tumblr @ saltyycommander.tumblr.com  
> please leave kudos and comments it really means a lot!!♥♥  
> and lets get ready for this klance adventure.  
> together.  
> I'm basically basing this off the Ella Enchated type of universe? The Galra are based off what the orgres in Ella Enchated look like!! See here: http://pmd205465tn.download.theplatform.com.edgesuite.net/Miramax/257/623/ludHBuYTrwU3Iy8BtaeXI5ikF42ugOhS_640x360_53956675834.jpg  
> ALSO ALSO!!!  
> I'm looking for a possible beta? HMU pls♥♥

                Altea is an average sized, but wealthy kingdom. It is ruled over by a fair king by the name of Shiro and his lovely and friendly queen, Allura. Altea was known to remain neutral in times of crisis with the other kingdoms. The Queen advised getting into wars that Altea had no part in. It kept their country thriving and well, _alive_.

                Queen Allura was kind to her people. She actively went out into the kingdom, helping where she can and spreading joy throughout the land. Truly, she was the heart of Altea. King Shiro was merely a figure head and allowed his queen to do as she wished. She ran Altea well and was adored by all who were in her presence for a matter of minutes.

                The king and queen had no children, but there was still an heir to the throne. Shiro had a younger brother, named Keith. He was the prince of the land and next in line for the throne. Shiro knew that he and Allura would not live forever and with Prince Keith being the only heir, he made it his sole duty to keep his little brother well protected.

                Things in Altea were peaceful. Things were great. Until a rumor had spread that had left the King in utter disbelief.

The rumor had reached him from his trusty advisor, Coran, while Queen Allura was meeting with their people. Once again, she was trying to help them the best she could. People were lined up all the way out the door for a chance to speak with her. Shiro was sitting in his large, black and gold throne. Allura was standing out in front on the first step that led up to their thrones while she spoke to the people.

                Coran had quietly walked into the room, side stepping towards Shiro. Shiro was watching his queen, a large and proud smile spread on his face. He almost didn’t notice Coran dropping the parchment on his lap. He grabbed it and looked up at him. Coran gave him a solemn nod. Shiro sighed and unrolled it. He quickly read it over and bit his bottom lip.

                “I see. I understand. Thank you, Coran. Please await my orders. I shall see you after the Queen has finished,” Shiro said, rolling it back up and handing it to him. Coran stepped back to bow to him, before leaving the throne room. Allura turned to look back at them, a worried look in her eyes. Shiro gave her a weak smile and waved her off. She simply nodded and turned back to her people.

                Once Allura had gotten the line down, after speeding through many people, she turned to her king, her hands clutched together at her chest. Fear plagued her beautiful face and Shiro felt his heart sink. He did not want to see her like this, pained.

                “What is it? What’s wrong?” she asked, sitting next to him on her own throne. Allura grabbed onto his hand and scanned his face, looking for answers. Shiro looked around the room, double checking to see that the only people in the room were the two of them and their guards.

                “It’s the Galra kingdom. There is word that King Zarkon is sending his guards to kill us. Possibly tonight. They wish to take over Altea. I knew this day would come once he began to attack our neighbors, but I did not want to believe it. Altea is in trouble. We’re in trouble,” he explained, looking away. He did not want to see her eyes. Not now.

                “We must send our guards to protect our people. They are our priority. Who’s to say this isn’t a farce to lower our guard? So that we keep our protection and leave our people defenseless? I cannot let that happen, Shiro. I won’t our people die because we’re scared for our lives. We—we have Keith! If we parish, he will keep our kingdom thriving! Right?” Allura rushed out, tears forming in the corners of her eyes.

                Shiro’s head snapped up and he grabbed both of her hands, staring her right in the eyes. He said, “No! I cannot lose you, Allura. I will not let anything happen to you. You will be safe.”

                She smiled at him, freeing one hand to stroke his cheek. He leaned into her touch and kissed her palm. She whispered a ‘shh’ to him and he fought back his tears. Shiro did not want to lose his kingdom, but he also couldn’t bear to lose his queen.

                “We will be okay. I have faith in our guards. If we send them out, they will keep the Galra knights at bay and away from our kingdom. It will be okay.”

                “Okay. I trust you. I’ll go speak with Coran now,” Shiro said. Allura kissed his cheek and pulled away from him. Shiro stood up, sighing heavily. But as he stood, the doors in front of them slammed open.

                “No! No, no, no! You cannot go in there! Your Highness! Wait!” Coran shouted, chasing after the young man.

                “What is this that I hear? Altea is going to be under attack?” Prince Keith said, his fists clenched at his sides as he stormed over to Shiro and Allura. The Queen rose and stood next to Shiro, grabbing onto his arm. Keith looked furious, sweat dripping down his forehead. His dark red cape billowed behind him as he made his way up to the thrones. The gold decals on his outfit shimmered under the torches light. His brows were furrowed deeply as he stopped in front of them. “I need to go out and protect our kingdom then!”

                “No, Keith, you know you cannot do that. If you get hurt or die, Altea will be in trouble without an heir. You have to stay in the castle,” Shiro said with an affirmative tone.

                “I will not let our people die, Shiro. I am not a coward. I can handle myself. You know I’m a strong fighter,” said Keith, pulling back his cloak to reveal his favorite broadsword, sheathed on him. Shiro smiled at him, placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder.

                “I understand that you fight well, but I still will not allow it. I am your _king_ , Keith. You will obey me. Please, I know you are skilled, but I cannot let you get hurt. My family will stay safe. We are not even sure Altea will be attacked.”

                “Your Majesty! I tried to stop him! I knew he’d just come in here, shouting and what not! I _knew_ he would react this way. And yet I still told him. I really need to know when to stop, eh?” Coran said, running after them. Keith turned around to shoot Coran a glare, but the older man ignored it. He was used to Keith shooting daggers at him. Coran bowed on one knee to the king and queen. “What are your orders, sire?”

                “Coran, order the guards to round the perimeter of Altea. Now. The Galra could be on their way as we speak. We must be ready to fight back. No Galra is to enter our villages. Is that understood?” Shiro said, his kingly voice coming through.

                “Yes, your majesty. I’ll see to it right away!” Coran said, already running out of the room. Keith turned to follow after him, but Shiro grabbed his arm.

                “Keith, you heard what I said. No fighting.”

                Keith pulled his arm away from him and scoffed. Allura stepped forward and gently tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around, still frowning. Allura wrapped her arms around him tightly, burying her face in his neck.

                “It’s because we care about you Keith. We don’t wish to lose you,” she whispered. He sighed and hugged her back for a second, before shrugging himself away.

                “I get that you guys care. I just don’t want innocent people to die when I could’ve done something about it. It’s their lives or mine and I choose to save theirs,” he explained, turning around again and sulking out of the room. Shiro reached out his hand to him, but he knew it was too late. Keith, without a doubt, would try and sneak out to fight.

                Once he was out of the room, Shiro turned to Allura and said, “Perhaps we should send him away? We have allies in a kingdom not too far from here. They would take him in and hide him, right?”

                Allura smiled, but shook her head, placing a hand on Shiro’s chest. “We can use that as a last moment effort. They might notice him trying to escape and that would cause much more trouble.”

                He paused to think, but just ended up agreeing with her. Taking her hand in his, he led her out of the room and spoke to each other in hushed tones.

                Night finally came and the castle was tense. It was practically empty in the castle. There were a few servants, but all the knights were sent out to protect the kingdom. It was Allura’s idea and Shiro wanted to keep some at the castle, but Allura insisted their knights could use all the help. Coran was in charge of keeping Keith locked in his room. Keith had already tried to sneak out using his tower window, but Coran had caught him. So now the two of them were in the prince’s room, chatting idly. They tried to ignore the anxious feeling that spread throughout the castle like a plague.

                Shiro and Allura were inseparable for the day. They were both too frightened to leave the other’s side. Thanks to the fear that the other might not come back should they separate. In fact, they rarely ever left the throne room. They had been sitting in their thrones, mostly sitting in silence, enjoying the other’s company, but they did speak. And when they did, it was over the issue of Keith. Shiro wanted to send him away to protect him, but Allura said sending him alone would only risk putting him in more danger.

                Of course the King would not send him by himself! He would have Coran escort him away as quietly as possible. Shiro and his advisor had talked briefly before he and Allura had glued themselves to the hip essentially. Coran had a cue to get Keith out of there, should it happen. And only Coran knew the cue.

                “Coran, do you think someone will really try and kill Shiro and Allura?” Keith asked, sitting on the middle of his bed. Coran sat at the plush chair that sat in front of his vanity desk. Keith was anxiously tugging at the ends of his black hair.

                “Well, I would hate to lie to you, but I think it’s a real chance. They might come after you too, should it happen. Which is why you are ordered to remain confined to your room! And why I’m here looking after you,” Coran said with a wink. Keith huffed a sigh and crossed his arms over his chest. He looked out his window. The stars glowed beautiful over the land, but other than that it was practically pitch black. He had a gut feeling something was going to happen and it was going to happen soon.

                “I need to protect them. With all the guards gone, they’re left defenseless!” Keith urged. Coran arched a brow at him and leaned to him.

                “You really think the King can’t handle himself? Have you seen him? It may have been a while since his last actual fight, but the King is a very strong, powerful man!”

                “You have a point, but still! Then, who’s going to protect the few servants that stayed?”

                “Your Highness, you are not going to be leaving your room unless an emergency calls for it.”

                Angrily, the prince flopped onto his back with an exasperated sigh. Coran paid no mind to it for the prince was always pretty stubborn and hot headed. He’s know the child since he was born, he knew how to handle him.

                The two of them sat in silence, Keith being too angry to really talk. He felt helpless just lying in bed like that. He wanted to do something, to help someone. But he wasn’t even sure there was anything going on. Just that there was a _rumor_ there might be an attack today.

                But then it happened. It was so quick Keith wasn’t even sure it was real.

                There was a scream from outside of his bedroom. He bolted up right and Coran put his finger to his lips motioning him to be silent. Keith nodded, but he slowly slid out of bed, trying to reach for his sword. Coran shook his head and Keith froze. There were footsteps outside the door. Their breathing hitched. Keith could feel his hands begin to sweat and bit his bottom lip. Coran’s eyes were locked on the door and his hand outstretched to his own sword, propped up against the wall.

                They could hear the locked handle jiggle, as if someone was trying to get in. Keith’s heart was racing. He was ready to fight if they burst in, whoever they were. After a moment, the jiggling stopped and they heard retreating footsteps. But now was not the time for relieved sighs. Coran’s head slowly turned in Keith’s direction, but his eyes never left the door.

                “Your Highness, listen to me. I was ordered by King Shiro to get you out of here. Slip on your cloak and sword. We’re going to move quietly in here, understood?” whispered a nervous Coran. Keith nodded and slowly got off his bed. He put his sword and his deep red cloak back on. Coran untied a small leather pouch from his waist and handed it to Keith. He pointed to Keith’s waist and the prince understood. He tied that through a belt loop and nodded at Coran.

                Coran then went to the door and motioned for Keith to stay put for a moment. He unsheathed his sword and carefully opened the door, trying to make as little noise as possible. Looking down the hallways and listening carefully for anyone, Coran deemed it safe when he found it to be empty. Keith did not draw his sword, but he kept his hands and mind ready. Coran motioned for him to follow and he did so obediently.

                “Stay close, your Highness. And stay sharp,” Coran murmured in a worried tone. The two crept down the large hallway to the tower’s staircase. They could not find the source of the screaming, but the two were too focused on getting out of the tower. Coran froze as he heard voices down the tower stairwell.

                “Coran let me go through. I have to get to Shiro. I need to make sure he’s safe,” Keith whispered, trying to step ahead. Coran placed an arm in front of him and shook his head, his face completely stern. Keith gave him a pleading look, but the man would not budge.

                Instead, the two began the slow and cautious descent down the stairs. Keith stayed very close behind Coran, who had his sword drawn and ready to battle. The voices got further and further away instead of closer, so it was a good sign.

                “Once we get down to the bottom, we need to go outside to the knight’s stables,” Coran whispered.

                “Why? Aren’t all of the knights out defending Altea?”

                “There should be someone there. Someone who didn’t quite get the memo. We need anyone to take you.”

                “I’m not going anywhere Coran! I’m staying here and protecting my family.”

                “The King had specifically instructed me to not let you do exactly that. You are not allowed in the throne room. The Galra are already there, no doubt. It is too late.”

                “I can’t let them die Coran!” Keith said, just a little too loudly. The two of them froze as they heard rushing footsteps head their way. Coran turned to give the prince a _nice-going-_ look. Keith gave him a sheepish smile as they both braced for what was to come.

* * *

 

                Meanwhile, in the throne room, Shiro and Allura sat calmly in their thrones. They held their heads high and their backs were straight. They were not going to cower in fear as the bashes on the thick and tall throne room doors got louder and faster. They knew it was coming and they did not fear death. Shiro knew Keith and Coran should be on their way out of the kingdom by now. His heart felt at ease knowing the heir would be safe and could hopefully return with help from the neighboring kingdoms to push back the Galra knights.

                Allura held her king’s hand, but they did not look at each other. Their eyes were glued to the doors as they burst open and Galra knights poured into the throne room. There was shouting and shoving as they all made their way up to them. Someone in charge, presumably, pushed to the front of them. He lifted his helmet off. His face was ghostly white, but the rest of his skin was a deep purple. The man had an eyepatch covering his right eye and a crooked grin spread on his face. His pointed ear twitched before he spoke.

                “King Shiro and Queen Allura of Altea, surrender now,” the commanding knight said, his voice booming throughout the room.

                “If you’re going to kill us, kill us now,” the Queen said, her voice only faltering a bit at the end. Shiro squeezed her hand for support.

                The knight looked a little taken aback, but he laughed. With his laugh, the other knights chimed in, until he cut them off abruptly with a clearing of his throat.

                “We are not here to kill you. Not yet. King Zarkon has sent us to take you. Pathetic, how you leave yourselves with zero defenses. This will be easy,” the knight smirked.

                Shiro stood up and removed his crown, setting it on the throne behind him. Allura looked up at him, fear in her eyes. The King took a step forward towards them and the knights readied their weapons. Shiro took a strong stance and staring the commander knight in the eye, he said, “We will not give in so easily. Do not look down on us. Alteans are strong people. As are their leaders.”

                “Shiro! No, please don’t!” the Queen shouted, jumping up from her throne and running over to Shiro. She threw her arms around him, almost to the point of sobbing. The knight laughed at them once more and snapped his fingers. The king and queen were surrounded instantly and the knights pulled them apart. Shiro and Allura fought to break free, but there were too many. Their arms stretched out for each other one last time before they were fully separated, bound and gagged and dragged away.

                The King was dragged away first. He watched the other knights pull at Allura’s hair and shove her this way and that. He tried to call out for her, but it was to no use. Tears rolled down his cheeks as they were taken away. He feared for Altea’s future in his last moments of consciousness. A metal fist connected with the side of his skull and he was out.

* * *

 

                Keith and Coran were frozen, waiting for the approaching Galra knights. They were not sure how many there would be, but they were ready. Coran even whispered to Keith, ‘ _be ready for anything_ ’.

                But as they waited, there were some shouts coming from down at the end of stairs. After quick cheering, the knights seemed to have ran away. Coran and Keith shrugged it off as they finished going down the stairs. But, then it hit them once they landed on that final step.

                “N-No. It can’t be,” Keith said, his face twisting into a mix of pain and fear as he dropped to his knees. Coran turned around in time to catch the falling prince.

                “It’s not too late. Come on we have to get out of here! This way to the knight’s stables!” Coran said, ushering him out of a large window without any glass. It was a little drop onto the grass below, but it was a short cut. Coran and Keith then sprinted down the field, trying to make it to the stables. Keith’s sight was blurred by his tears, thinking about his brother and how he could be dead. In his mind, Keith knew he was the new king now. And he had to be brave. For Shiro.

                The stables were almost entirely black except for one area that seemed to be lit by a few torches. Coran and Keith snuck inside, completely silent. There could be Galra knights there for all they knew.

                But loud, obnoxious snores said otherwise.

                Coran peaked over a horse stall to where the snores were coming from. Sure enough, a young knight without his armor was napping on a pile of hay. Coran hit himself on the forehead. Of course it had to be _this one._ This was their last hope?!

                “Sir Lance! Awaken in the presence of your Prince!” Coran said, his tone quite serious. But all he got in response was another loud snore. Keith rolled his eyes. He wasn’t looking over the stall like Coran was, but he was sure this knight had to be young and inexperienced if he were able to sleep through orders like that. All knights were _supposed_ to be defending the villages of Altea, after all.

                Angrily, Coran shouted at the knight, “ _Wake up you moron!_ ”

                The knight yelled as he jumped up, trying to awkwardly salute Coran in the process. He yawned and rubbed his sleepy eyes with the back of his hand.

                “With all due respect Sir Coran, what exactly did I do that needed to be woken up like this?” he yawned. Keith could now see him. He looked like an average Altean citizen. The knight had short, messy brown hair, more than likely due to his nap on the hay stack, and eyes the color of the early night sky. His features were nicely chiseled out, like his jawline for example. His body was long and lean, not too muscular but he had something. The knight was dressed in a blue tunic with a thick black belt around his waist. The collar and sleeve trim was a lighter blue shade, but not too much lighter. He wore dark black pants and knee high black boots. Okay, he was slightly more than the average Altean. This, _Sir Lance,_ did not even have a weapon on him. Could he even fight?

                “You were sleeping…during an incredibly important order. From the King himself,” Coran said, holding back his anger. Coran wasn’t one to get too angry, but he wasn’t a sight to be around when he was. Lance scratched at his cheek, avoiding Coran’s eyes and thinking of an excuse.

                “Yes, I, uh, well—another knight told me to stay back and watch the horses! I mean, there’s only two left, but someone needs to watch them! Right?” Lance said, a nervous laugh at the end. Keith stepped forward from the shadows then, pulling the hood of his cloak down.

                “So you still fell asleep on the job?” Keith said. He was thankfully that the lighting was awful. He knew from crying his eyes would be red and he cannot appear weak in front of his people.

                His presence must have frightened the young knight because Lance gave out a small yelp and bent down in front of Keith.

                “Your Highness! I’m sorry about—not bowing earlier. I think.”

                “It’s fine. You may rise. Do you have any weapons or armor with you? The King and Queen are in danger. We need to go save them,” Keith said.

                “No! No, no, no! That is not why we need Sir Lance. He’s serving another purpose. Please tell me that you _do_ have your horse in these stables?” Coran said, shaking his head and waving his arms. Keith grunted and looked away. He could just turn and make a run for the castle anyway. Shiro needs his help.

                “I do. Bleu is in her stalling, resting. Sir Coran, what is going on? Are the Queen and King okay?”

                Keith and Corans’ heads go up and then they look at each other with pained expressions. Lance watches the two of them and nods sadly.

                “I understand. It’s not good. Well, what can I do to help?” Lance said.

                “King Shiro has given me explicit orders to find someone to escort Prince Keith to the neighboring kingdom of Balmera. We have allies there. Bring the Prince to the King. Prince Keith, in that pouch I gave you is a letter for the King of Balmera and some gold for any troubles. Sir Lance, you are to take your horse and the Prince to Balmera. But once you leave, Prince Keith is entirely your responsibility. Keep him safe and alive. We hope that the kingdom of Balmera will come help free Altea from the Galra as I’m afraid it is probably too late already. You must go now. Quickly!” Coran explained, but Keith shook his head the whole time.

                “Coran I can go to Balmera on my own. I don’t need a lowly knight’s help!” the Prince huffed. Lance’s jaw dropped.

                “Excuse _me_ your Highness! But I was _top_ of my class in knight training! I am very capable of protecting you! Even if I don’t want to!” Lance retorted back, leaning at the Prince. Keith leaned back, his cheeks flaring.

                “How dare you speak like that to me?! I am a way more experienced fighter than you! I’ll take a horse and go on my own!”

                “Your Highness! Sir Lance! Enough! You must go, now. I will return to the castle myself to see what I can do. But I will be on my way to Balmera myself tomorrow. Stay low and stay safe,” Coran said, interrupting the two before they got into a heated argument. Coran turned to Lance, who immediately got down to one knee and looked up at him. “Now Lance, I will be entrusting you with the most precious and dearest thing in my life.”

                Keith was shocked and honestly felt honored hearing this from Coran—until he noticed the man removed his sheath and sword and give it to Lance. The young knight’s face lit up with excitement as he looked over the beautifully crafted sword.

                “Thank you Sir Coran. It is an honor. Truly. Alright, your Highness. Let’s get on the road then. We need to get to Balmera as soon as possible,” Lance said, a wide smirk on his face. Keith fought the urge to hit him right in the face. The knight turned to go get his horse ready and Keith turned to Coran. The older male looked down at him, a smile on his face and tears in his eyes. Coran then pulled him into a tight, and rather uncomfortable hug. Keith wiggled and his arms flailed, but he eventually gave into the hug.

                “You are a strong young Prince, Keith. You will save Altea. I just know it,” Coran whispered in his ear. Keith’s heart raced as a tear rolled down his cheek. He hoped he would see Coran soon. The two men pulled apart and quickly wiped tears away as Lance returned. They coughed nervously, hoping Lance didn’t catch them.

                “Bleu is ready! Let’s go Prince Keith,” Lance said, pointing over his shoulder.

                “Why can’t I just take the other horse? I know my horse is on the other side of the castle, so she’s out of the question, but do I _have_ to ride the same horse as him?!” Keith moaned.

                “Yes! Now, go! Before any Galra knights catch us!” Coran said, pushing the Prince towards Lance. The two young men awkwardly bump chests, their noses almost touching. Keith jumped back from the knight, but followed him to the horse anyway.

                Lance’s horse was a tall and strong one. Her mane was cut short, but it looked smooth and silky. She was well kept. Keith couldn’t be too sure, but her coat looked like it was a solid black, like the night sky. But was there a blue tint? It would make sense for her name at least.

                Lance hopped on her first and then extended his hand down towards Keith, but the stubborn prince ignored his hand and tried to mount the horse himself. The knight sighed and grasped the horses reigns, waiting for the Prince to _finally get on the damn horse._ It took a little bit, but Keith manage. It’s not his fault his legs are rather short.

                “God speed you two, god speed,” Coran said at the exit of the stable. The moonlight cast a beautiful glow over them all.

                “Hold on tight _your Highness_ ,” Lance said. Keith hesitantly looked Lance up and down before he finally wrapped his arms around the other’s waist. He didn’t feel like falling off a horse and dying that night after all. Keith pressed his face into the other’s back, shielding it from the wind as Lance’s horse took off into the forest. Keith’s red cape billowed in the wind and Coran waved them off before running back to the castle. The night was a good cloak to hide their escape.

                “We can stop at my old cabin in the woods for supplies. It’s well hidden so I think we’ll be okay. Then, there’s a blacksmith friend I have we should pay a visit to. He's in a village in between the kingdoms. I think you’ll like him. He’s a great guy and makes amazing weapons,” Lance said. He continued to talk too as they raced through the woods, but Keith was only half listening.

                Keith wiggled his face on Lance’s back, accidentally inhaling his scent. It was a nice forest smell. It reminded him of a safe, warm home. But there was another smell that wasn’t so pleasant. Something that he couldn’t put a name to at first. Until he remembered where Lance was sleeping.

                Lance literally smelled like horse crap.


End file.
